Some times I just have to say fuck

A rant.
 Everything is so fucked up in my life and the world.
 Only a few days left to find a place to live.
Wrecked my truck last night.
Lost my peace of shit job last month.
 Wife went nuts. I mean psychotic.
Behind on the bills.

 The thing is you think I would have got use to this shit by now.
 When will I ever get ahead of this shit.
God must not like me to much.
Like most people.
When I was a kid my brothers pick on me.
My teachers and the other students.
Over the years I have had very few true friends and that never last.
Girl friends came along cheated and left.
Famly stole from me took advantages.
Seems like no one even cares about anyone but themselves anymore.
This beautiful land of ours is going to hell.
We're is the point in it? What's the purpose?
...

You would think after almost 30yrs of commitment, trust would have been built.
But no.
After all the hell of just the last 15 days.
I would think it would be there.
You give heart and soul just to get kick again.
I'm starting to believe love isn't enough.
Have I given to much?
How much more can I take?
God may be the only one that can answer that one.
 I am

What you said has cost beyond belief

Well here I am for a RANT.
To those that say they want to help
Then won't because its not jiving with there life style.
Fuck you.
To those that want to lay blame on anyone or anything other then the truth.
Fuck you.
To the one I stuck with and loved thru his hardest times I love you still.
But untill you pull your head out of your ass fuck you!
You said you want nothing to do with me.
Fine if thats it then keep it that way.
Don't ask me for nothing ever again.
You want to blame me for everything then
Go ahead. And as you said keep it away from your family. Fine. I will,just remimber.
My wife is my family and half of me.
She will come before my son.
Your ideals and lifestyle with pot is more important then your parent's.
If you have placed it before your earthly father I pray you haven't placed it before your heavenly father.
I can forgive.
Your prideful words can not be taken back.
M.M.

Potted. Like it or not. MaryJane will screw with you

If you have read my profile,you know why I chose my pin name.
Now don't let the name fool you.
I am sane, also very passionate about many things.
But I am getting away from why I am here tonight.
I'm going to blow my anonymity somewhat.
This June will be 34yrs clean and sober.
And tonight I am Mad.
I see all the propaganda being posted about the miracles of pot. Cabanas. Mary Jane. Weed. What ever the fuck you want to call it.
It's a fucking drug. Plant or not. Wild or grow in a garden or green house. It's a drug.
What is grow and sold today is not the same as 30 and 40 yrs ago.
Yes it has a few medical uses.
As well as clothes,rope,paper, other things as well.
It a drug!!!!!!
It is dangerous like it or not.
You can argue all you want. After 30+years of being in a 12 step program and helping others get clean and sober I have seen (as well as lived it)
Just how much damage this plant can do.
Just like alcohol.
It is addictive.
If you don't believe it. Understand this.
A addiction can happen with anything that a person uses to cope with or escape from life's struggles.
I can beat any argument you want to come up with so don't even try.
And if you do try understand this.
You can not and will not change what I know from all my years of being a pot head before recovery as well and more so as after.
Also remember the people that sale it may have altered it with who knows what.
 

look here as well.
this is not a complete list.

https://www.medicaldaily.com/7-hidden-health-dangers-smoking-marijuana-revealed-2016-406228?amp=1

https://amp.usatoday.com/amp/10386699

People talk about a zombie apocalypse. Well I think maybe we've got one going. I see people walking around hanging out totally oblivious to the world around them because they're playing with their phones. I think I'll call him phone zombies or maybe phonbies.
They wrecked cars walk into poles. Screwing around with their phones while on the clock instead of working causing coworkers to be late getting out period but yet they complain about getting out of work late.
They care more about online friendships then they do human contact it seems anymore.                            Yes it's definitely an apocalypse of Technology.

Once again I see where are modern conveniences the wonders of this new age are a burden and a plight on our society and on the family Network.
And I think the odds are probably good that there are some of these new age phonbies reading this right now.
Well there's a cure. PUT IT DOWN.

Almost 2yrs ago. (come this may) I went into centerpoint because of my heart & diabetes. Alot of people prayed for me, Thank you.
Here as Paul Harvey would say is the rest of the story.
I never got on the meds.
Doctors told me what most likely would happen or could happen if I didn't.
I was also referred to as a walking stroke....
With the medications & proper diet I could live a lot more years. With out not that many.
I live with pain every day. I have had chronic pain
for days on end. I have more good days then bad. I don't know wy I am lay'n this all out here other then to say I have made my peace with God and ready to go when he calls. But I am not sure if I have made my peace with all of you.
Also because none of us truly knows our final hr.
I have and do some that have it just as rough or worst then I.
Met many who have inspired me ,mentored helped me laugh and love. So to all those that have helped , prayed, lisson to my ranting. To those that have cried with me and for me. To those that loved me even when I did not deserve it.
Thank You. If no one has told you they love you today. Let me be the first.
God loves you and so do I.
  MadMan

I got my bucket of fuckits and headed down Don't-givashit lain.
I'm leaving propaganda avenue behind.
Common sense, morels and decency
just don't stand a chance in this world today it seems.
I will still stand by my God even when it feels like he has abandoned me....
But No longer will I tolerate others trying to force whats wrong on me saying its right just because everyone seems to be doing it.
If I have to go it alone so be it.
I will not go along to get along anymore!
NO MORE MR NICE GUY.
Consider this a deceleration of war.
I know I am not the only one.
Know & accept that. mfph.

Yours truly
The MadMan.
PS,
 As A add on. I will say this is some what a old position for me just need to rededicate myself to it.
I will say taking this kind of position and view on life carry's a price. At least one here. I believe any real pay off is in our heavenly rewards.
The price I have seen and payed it. willing to do so every time.
 This blog was wrote for one person whom I will not mention.
Until the next time.
 Privet MADMAN.
 The Lords Calvary.